He Hates You Because He Is A Cat
by ChronicallyinFlaming
Summary: Written for mass effect kink. Shepard is normally a dog person, but when the only thing between an adorable kitten and a Cerberus boot is Shepard? The Commander is going to blow someone's leg off. Shepard rescues a kitten. This kitten is fluffy, adorable, and loves Shepard. It does not love anyone else. This feeling is mutual with the rest of the crew.


**The Prompt: "He hates you because he is a cat."**

**Shepard is normally a dog person, but when the only thing between an adorable kitten and a Cerberus boot is Shepard? The Commander is going to blow someone's leg off.**

**Shepard rescues a kitten.**

**This kitten is fluffy, adorable, and loves Shepard. It does not love anyone else.**

**Javik hates this creature, but it has decided that his room is its room.**

**Does he plot a clever way to get rid of it?**  
**Does he bond with the crew over hating it?**  
**Does he eventually come to respect it because it is the only thing as judgmental as he is?**  
**Does he hate himself because petting a kitten's fuzzy tummy is so excellent it doesn't matter how much it judges him?**  
**Does it become _his_cat because it ends up liking him more than Shepard?**

**You tell me, anon.**

**Male or Female Shepard okay. It would be awesome if there were some Javik/Shep going on in this, but not required.**

**Double bonus for Shepard mocking him about the kitten.**  
**Triple bonus if Javik actually degenerates to the YOU ARE A KITTY phase of adorable cat-ownership.**

**The fill:  
**

* * *

Never before had he ever witnessed Shepard move so fast. It was as though the human didn't see the rifle in the Cerberus soldier's hand, the thick white armor, the rows of crates that he leapt and rolled around and over. Then the desperate leap at the soldier, his own weapon thrown to the side and forgotten. They collapsed, wrestling, grunting and rolling around on the floor.

Eventually, Javik found a shot that didn't involve taking Shepard's head off.

Bruised and bleeding, Shepard clung to a crate. "Is it okay?"

The asari was just as confused as the prothean. "Is what okay?"

"He was going to crush it! Crush _you_!"

Something also new: the sickening tone to the Commander's voice. Javik pulled his eyes from the human's face, and found what exactly he'd been referring to, what had to led to his random burst of adrenaline.

The small fuzzy orange creature and Shepard just about flew into each other's arms.

"You're okay now. It's okay now."

The words were nearly lost from the humming sound of the creature, its large yellow eyes closing with a delight even Javik could read. A 'M' traced onto his forehead in darker fur reminded him of the battle paint that turians wore.

"Shepard? Are you sure we should keep this animal?"

"Of course. Look at it! We can't just let the little guy run around and get hurt. Look at yooouuu. At his little belly. And those tiny ears."

In his smoke and blood spotted armor, Shepard carried the tiny beast back to the Normandy. Its hissing did nothing to alleviate the doubts the asari had. Quickly, it found its place out of Shepard's quarters, and traveled without any set path through the entire ship. Usually, it could be found behind the first thing you'd checked behind for its presence, right as soon as you had checked everything, and were sure it had moved to a different room of the ship, that you were safe from its hissing and sharp claws.

The creature and krogan gained an uneasy alliance of two predators with no mercy. The scarred salarian scientist gave out cream to rub onto the crews cuts. Shepard was nothing if not indulgent with the small furry 'cat,' and was blind to all its faults that grew day by day.

Even after it attacked the red-haired woman with her endless chattering and attempts at friendship with all beings. Even after it nearly killed the quarian through infection after attacking specific tubes of her suit. Even after it nearly blinded the turian, his yells heard even from the back of the ship. Even after running across the asari's keyboard and reportedly destroying several vital pieces of information to help with the war effort, and also attacking her small VI. Even after the fuzzy monster had backed the human pilot into a corner and nearly causing the ship to crash into the Citadel.

"I don't get it…he seems perfectly nice now?" Shepard could only shrug, and scratch behind the cat's small orange ears. "Just give him some time to adjust."

The Reapers were not the only creatures with indoctrination.

It became a not-uncommon sight to see crew members running from place to place. While he appreciated the seriousness of their actions, Javik was not amused by the cause. Nor was he impressed with the animal itself. He avoided it, however, but solely by chance. To be frightened by such a tiny fur covered _pet _was inconceivable.

He was not like the others of this ship, to scream childishly as the orange cat jumped onto a table to scare the crew members away from their foolish card games. Seeing those he'd almost respected fleeing after throwing entire plates and bowls of meat at the cat, as though to appease it, it only tired the prothean. Especially as it never worked, and only resulted in the clawed creature to chase them and hamstring one of the crew.

The cries of, "Leave me! Save yourself!" to the other's backs always seemed to go unheard by the Commander of the ship.

Javik turned away and went to his own quarters, in search of peace. These beings from this cycle were so helpless, how could they hope to defeat the Reapers? Beings so unimaginable powerful, strong enough to decimate entire species…what hope could these less species have of defeating such? Did they not understand their own planets and civilizations were to falling, one after another?

As soon as he closed the door, heading to the sink to wash his hands free of the pheromones from the others, all fear and panic and despair that did nothing to calm him, the beast leapt onto his shoulders. Despite the four clear eyes that allowed superior vision compared to the others, he had seen nothing of this attack. A yell did nothing to dislodge the monster reaching for one of those four eyes, seeing only orange and yellow stripes, feeling only the pain in his face from the claws, and in his shoulder from slamming into the wall. Nothing moved the cat except for sacrificing a hand to pull its claws free.

The beast…it knew how to climb, and to jump.

With a hiss, the beast ran beneath the counters. The yellow eyes glowed in the darkness.

"How did you get in here?" Javik asked the cat, who was licking its paw and rubbing its small head with it. Seemingly relaxing, until he moved towards it, only to avoid a claw to the face again. It spitting would seemingly never end.

Javik left it alone.

Yet still, Shepard refused to help. Nothing would dissuade him, even after seeing the prothean covered in healing cream taken from the salarian. "Surely it is attacked you as well."

"Nope. He's a sweet little kitten. Really, I don't know why he doesn't like you guys. But he's really harmless. He can't get near the fish. And the hamster can take care of itself."

"You must discipline that animal, if you wish to keep it!"

The easy smile that usually played at Shepard's mouth disappeared and left only a chilly blue gaze. "Javik. You're my friend. But if anything happens to Fuzzy, I cannot be held responsible for my actions."

"You cannot be—"

"_Anything_."

Yet avoiding the cat was no longer an option, since it was nesting beneath Javik's bedding. An attempt was made to fight back with sleeping pills in warm white milk, pressed forward by an equally white hand by the wincing human female Williams…only to have an orange paw knock the bowl over and those involved forced to scatter. As though it had sensed such plots against its life, and the prothean was forced to bat at the animal until Williams could sneak away.

"I owe you one, Javik!"

But the prothean was too busy fending the cat off to properly respond. Especially when Shepard walked in to him pointing a gun at his beloved pet, and yelling threats.

"I expect you to treat Fuzzy like part of this crew!" Shepard had yelled, face flushing with anger.

As the orange animal curled into a ball, looking like nothing more than a tiny fluffy pillow. The Commander carried him off, only to somehow let the monster out of his cabin and down the elevator where it found itself in the shower with Javik. Despite what the crew members had whispered to one another, water was not this cat's weakness.

Water…only enraged it.

The asari had to_ help_ Javik from the bathroom, using her biotics to lift the prothean away, and together they ran from the hissing wet cat. "Javik. You were in the female washroom again."

"Something must be done."

"There are signs-"

"About that animal."

"Felines can live up to forty-years, with proper care. We'll outlive it," Liara assured him.

"Not if it kills us before the Reapers do!"

But Javik had a plan, as they neared the nearest planet. Something so simple that it would have been hard to have it disrupted. As they stopped at the next planet, he would simply throw the thing outside the airlock. The pilot would cover for him, and the others would distract Shepard. By the time the Commander realized that the cat was missing (which would take days considering how capricious the pet was), it would be too late.

On that planet, it would run away, never to be seen again. Possibly, it would be eaten by whatever native species lived there. Shepard would mourn, but would understand now what was to be focused on: the Reapers. Not petting his pet's soft pink stomach, as it rolled around and flexed its claws in enjoyment as those watching flinched away. The clear adoration of Shepard towards the creature would perhaps be turned on something more deserving of respect, even if that thing lacked small tufted ears and did not possess the ability to purr…

Despite how Javik had dismissed the illogical and superstitious belief of the crew that the cat could understand what they'd say, he had to admit that perhaps there was something to it. He'd made no attempt at lowering his voice when explaining the plan to the asari and the pilot, both of whom had nodded and agreed with the prothean. Then turned pale as they heard hissing sounded from the corner of Javik's quarters. The orange tail swatted the air, yellow eyes narrowed.

Both of the two beings from this cycle recoiled. "It heard us! It knows!"

"Perhaps this is not the best course of action?"

He had not waited so many years in cryo just to allow this tiny fuzzy thing to affect their mission. "No. This stops. As soon as we are able to, we will rid ourselves of this menace."

Javik's lips peeled back from his sharp teeth in an almost human smile. The animal responded by stretching and licking itself.

* * *

Finding the animal proved as difficult as he'd thought. It was as though it could sense what they could think, what they planned. Pathetically, he tried to enact a facade of calm. To continue on with his business, yes, nod here and look dutiful rather than screaming with frustration. So much rode on this mission's success, on this crew. They needed no distractions. The Prothean washed his hands again, and then checked on the conditions of his guns, of the ship, of his armor.

Only after he'd fallen asleep at the table in the crew's common room did it come. Javik awoke with it leaping through the air, making that low sound that no ship could match, claws outstretched and gleaming in the dim blue light. He caught it, and almost wished he had not. The cat appeared to convulse, hissing and screaming in an almost human way.

Javik pried the thing's claws from tearing out his jugular. "You are only a cat!"

'Fuzzy's' response was to go for his eyes.

The prothean let go, feeling something worse than just the pain in his hands and face. He fled as he hadn't done even to the Reapers, not turning his head to look back. He ran blindly through the halls, bouncing into the walls and knowing too well not to hide in the small bathrooms. When the thing came up in _front _of his feet to trip him, Javik fell to the cold steel of the ship. And felt only relief that he hadn't been mauled.

He came back into his room, for the healing creams. The asari was there, waiting.

They needed no exchange of words.

"It is more intelligent that I had expected," he allowed. "But I will not let it compromise our mission."

"It might be best to live and let live. Do what Shepard would do, and compromise?"

"Does that thing '_compromise'_? Is it capable of such?! No, there is no other solution." Javik smeared his face, feeling the pain ease, feeling like a turian, like a human, like another primitive. This is what that fuzzy creature had done to him, and that could not be forgiven. He could not bear to clean his hands free of shame, of fear, and risk seeing his reflection in the water or in a mirror.

The asari saw something of this. She could see his feeling on his _face_. "I have an idea."

* * *

Both the female human and the male one with the thicker facial hair agreed to be the bait. It came at moments of joy, it was surmised. Any looks cast downward or over the shoulder could not be risked. "Yeah, Joker, good one."

"Hah-ha, Ashley, hah. Hah."

Their laughter could not fool a child.

With the same stilted gestures, Liara was hitting balls made of some teeth (by the sound of them clicking together) with a stick. Grimly aiming the stick to push a ball into one of the four holes. The purpose of this game (if it had one), passed by the understanding of Javik. He watched, nonetheless, ignoring the hollow sound of fake amusement behind him. Ignoring how the time that weighed so heavily on him, every second counted and if Shepard caught them-

"That's hilarious."

"I've never laughed so hard!"

The asari knocked a black ball into a hole while the humans nearly began screaming at one another.

"Fucking hilarious to end up like this!"

"This wasn't what I signed up for! Hahaha."

A flash of teeth. "Join the club!"

"This thing's going to be the end of us all, isn't it? That's so goddamn amazing I could just shoot myself!"

"The end of all our civilizations' existence," Liara muttered, aiming the primitive stick towards another ball. "Very funny."

"Fuzzy is headed in your direction," the ship warned them before falling silent. Its prudence was disconcerting.

When it entered, none could breathe. None bothered to say a warning, a pledge, a prayer. They waited, not shifting, smiling at one another. "If I don't make it out of this, Ashley, make sure to burn all the Formax in my trunk before they send it to my family."

He waved his arms, wildly, yelling for help, then sinking to the floor slowly and safely as to not break anything. Laid on his side, curled and defenseless. "No. No!"

Those orange ears shot downward, eyes narrowed, and then they turned, together, as they weren't even in a firefight. The blast of biotics scooped the ball of orange fur upward. She glowed, the asari, moving forward unafraid with the beast lifted up, the human female rolling forward and over the man that really did begin to cry out in true pain.

"Go, go, go. Open the door now, EDI."

Javik led the way. For perhaps the first time since Shepard had found the cat, Javik knew what he was: the Avatar of Vengeance. _First this small animal, then the Reapers,_ he allowed himself to think. Step by step, justice would be done.

As always in this cycle, nothing worked out as planned.

The Reapers waited on this planet, and he was rather horrified by the fact he was more distracted by the animal that had begun to struggle than those who had wiped out his civilization and would do the same to these others. The human, Ashley, blasting away another Husk brought him back to this realization.

Below them, the landscape was cratered and swarming with the hideous creatures that had once been truly sentient. This new ruined planet's atmosphere was breathable, but just barely from the smoke and scent of rot. Normandy's ship was informing them of the danger, how low their altitude was, how not even Joker (had he been piloting) could continue flying like this for long.

"Do it, Liara," the human warrior woman screamed, hair blowing back and nearly blinding the prothean. "Do it now!"

The asari threw the cat out the open airlock. With a firm gesture, fearless even as another Husk reached out to grab her. Javik kicked the thing aside, still watching the spinning orange ball. Adrenaline ran through him, reminding him of his duty and his life, and he felt no pity as the creature landed on a Harvester. It screamed louder than a Banshee, especially when the Harvester shook its head and sent the beast flying _back _towards the ship, and past the door and into Javik's chest so they fell together.

The rest of the fight was a blur. Somehow he found a gun, too small and painful for his hand. At one point he found himself hissing, at Fuzzy or at a Scion. Something warm in his free hand, him perhaps throwing the pet onto a Marauder's face onto to have animal flying back by the enemy. Had he held the animal up, using it as a shield, or as a weapon? In time, someone pulled the gun away, and he felt blood pooling into his head. Cool sanity spreading back as the asari used a medpac to help the human female. He blinked and waited until he understood.

Shepard crouched there. With his cat in his arms. They had the same smile of pride.

The quarian helped Ashley and Liara up, as Javik slipped downward. How many…it did not matter. A start.

"There are worse things than even this thing."

"I think he likes you Javik," Shepard confided. "Rub his belly. He likes that. I'm just so glad to see everyone getting along."

Even the Avatar of Vengeance could grow too tired to fight. And he could certainly appreciate the fighting skills of this beasts as it curled into his lap and dug in, even now ferocious. In time, maybe he could even come to enjoy the sound of its purring and how soft its stomach was when petted.


End file.
